(From the April 2010 edition of HopeSpeak)

For three years, someone who called himself a ‘man of God’ abused me. The pastor used his power and control, manipulation and fear, to prey on women who were easy targets (previous victims of sexual abuse), including myself.

When I began attending the church, I fell in love with a young man named Brad. The minister tore us apart and wouldn’t allow us to communicate with one another, or even make eye contact when we were in one another’s presence.
 
Brad left the church because of the impossible conditions we faced. Shortly after he left, the abuse began. As the months passed, my life grew increasingly hopeless. The guilt, fear and anxiety of being abused were overwhelming. Eventually, I became suicidal. I reached out to Brad, wanting desperately to be with him, but feeling there was no way out of the horror I was in.
 
On December 11, 2007, I broke away from my abuser. The abuse had a tremendous negative effect on my relationship with God. It has taken months for me to even be able to pray again. God, The Hope of Survivors, Brad and my loving family have all banded together with love and prayer to support me through this ordeal. My relationship with Brad has been rekindled. We are very much in love and happy to be together, Lord willing, forever!
 
Sometimes it seems my abuser has ‘gotten away’ with what he did. I may never see justice on this earth. However, I have a promise from God in Ecclesiastes 12:14, “For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil.”
 
I believe God brought The Hope of Survivors into my life. He spared my life and gave me hope when I found their website. Without their unending love, help and consistent support, I doubt I would be alive today. They have helped me understand what I’m going through as I heal. They pray for me and with me, and have helped me restore my relationship with the Lord and better understand His love and care for me. I cannot humanly express the gratitude I have for The Hope of Survivors for helping me.

Heather, Illinois